A Parent's Guide: Tactile Defensiveness

Helping a child with tactile defensiveness can be challenging, but with the right strategies, it’s possible to ease their discomfort and build tolerance for touch.


What is Tactile Defensiveness?

Tactile defensiveness occurs when a child’s brain overreacts to touch stimuli, making everyday sensations like clothing or grooming feel overwhelming.

By incorporating sensory diets, deep pressure techniques, and gradual exposure, you can help your child become more comfortable with touch and improve their ability to navigate daily life.

Deep Pressure Input

Children with tactile defensiveness often find deep pressure calming, as it provides grounding sensory input. Some effective methods include:

  • Weighted blankets or vests: These offer gentle, consistent pressure that can help calm the nervous system.

  • Firm, predictable hugs: Deep, firm hugs or squeezes are often more tolerable than light touches, which can feel startling.

  • Heavy work activities: Tasks like pushing, pulling, or carrying heavy objects provide calming, grounding sensory input.

Gradual Exposure to Touch

Desensitising a child to touch requires a slow, structured approach. Gradual exposure helps reduce sensitivity over time:

  • Non-threatening activities: Start with calming sensations like water play, which is soothing for many children.

  • Sensory bins: Fill bins with rice, beans, or water beads to allow children to explore textures in a controlled way.

  • Introducing new textures: Once the child is comfortable, slowly introduce more challenging sensations, like sand or finger paints.

Engaging Activities to Support Sensory Integration

Incorporating fun and engaging activities can help children adjust to different textures and sensations in a playful environment:

  • Messy play: Encourage play with materials like shaving cream, play dough, or slime to make touching new textures enjoyable.

  • Texture walks: Have the child walk barefoot on various surfaces like grass, sand, or foam mats to introduce tactile input in a low-pressure way.

  • Water play: Pouring water, squeezing sponges, and playing with water toys can be both soothing and stimulating.

  • Brushing protocol: Under the guidance of an occupational therapist (OT), sensory brushing can help desensitise the skin over time.

Example Sensory Diet

A sensory diet can help children with tactile defensiveness become more comfortable with touch by gradually exposing them to different sensations. These sensory diet activities, when done consistently, can make everyday routines more manageable for your child.

Here are some strategies:

  • Deep Pressure Activities

    • Bear hugs, weighted blankets, or vests provide comforting pressure and help regulate the nervous system.

  • Textural Exploration

    • Introduce fun textures (sand, rice, slime) in a safe setting; start with familiar textures, gradually adding new ones for confidence building.

  • Body Awareness Exercises

    • Activities like pushing/pulling heavy objects, carrying a weighted backpack, or doing animal walks help with body awareness and reduce touch sensitivity.

  • Gentle Desensitisation in Daily Routines

    • Use gentle lotion massage or soft brushing before bed to introduce new sensations gradually.

  • Incorporate Movement Breaks

    • Swinging, jumping, or dancing provide calming sensory input, which helps reduce defensiveness to touch.


Helping a child with tactile defensiveness requires patience, understanding, and a structured approach.

Through deep pressure techniques, a tailored sensory diet, and gradual exposure to touch, children can slowly build tolerance and learn to navigate tactile stimuli more comfortably. Partnering with an OT can ensure the right strategies are in place, allowing children to thrive in their sensory experiences.

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